Verification Part II

I don't have words to describe what happened to me last night.

I was laying in bed around 12:30 am, after entertaining out-of-town town friends for a little bit and then it happened. I was flat on my back (bad second-trimester girl that I am) and was waiting patiently for the late night flutters that have been happening the past week or so.

And then, this little baby gave me much more than I had bargained for- 3 nice, strong KICKS. It just blew me away. The first one was low down, just South of my belly button and I knew I had imagined it- then not a minute later there was another one, just as strong, in the same location. At this point I am trying to lay as still as possible, hoping for just one more and telling Brad excitedly that I am getting quite the show and then there was another, just as low but off to the right and I swear I had tears in my eyes.

I have seen the baby on sonograms, heard it's little heartbeat but nothing, nothing compared to those little bomp, bomp, bomps that s/he graced me with last night. Brad told me, just wait a few months and you'll be begging it to stop moving around but in that moment, nothing else mattered.

I am so in love.

Verification!

I had my 16 week doctor's appointment today and it did not disappoint! After not hearing the heartbeat at our last appointment (but seeing it via ultrasound) I finally got to hear Baby M's little heart beating! The heartrate was right at 150- this has thrown my mom for a loop. At our last appointment the heartrate was 140 so she was convinced it was a boy- now she says it is either a very active little boy or a very sleepy little girl. I guess we will find out for sure in 2 more weeks!

I swear, I had chill bumps all over my body when I heard that strong heart beating. I never thought it would be so amazing- there aren't even words to describe how incredible-heart wrenching-overwhelming-indescribable that sound can make you feel. I only wish Brad had been able to hear it, too. Next time, I hope!

Brynn Riley Cronin 

Saying Good-bye

Yesterday was my last day at work and actually a lot easier than I had anticipated. We had a nice day- Little Gym in the morning followed by a picnic in the park which Brynn just loved. Of course she did more playing than eating but hey, she's 2! She never did actually fall asleep during her nap but cuddled on my lap with me for almost 30 minutes which was just what I needed from her. When it came time for me to leave it was hard, but I didn't cry (too much.) Jennifer and Barry walked me out and both gave me a nice hug and thanked me for everything and then I had to say 'bye to Brynn. She came and gave me a big hug and a kiss and said "Bye Jedda" over and over until I got into my car, waving her little hand at me. Such a sweet little girl.

I thought I was going to be okay- I had a big lump in my throat but managed to hold off the tears until my mom called me and after I talked to her I cried but just for a few minutes, nothing like last week. I'll miss her like crazy, I know that much.

Now I know, though, what I have to look forward to as a mother- excpet for the leaving part, of course. It's crazy how fast this pregnancy is going- 15 weeks almost over, only 25 more to go. The first two weeks of football season are over- this is the fastest time of the year for us so that means 2006 is right around the corner!

Prayers needed

So today may have been one of the hardest I have had in a long time. I went to work this morning to find that my boss has decided to take a leave of absence from work. She left me hanging all day, with no suggestions as to what this would mean for me. I really didn't think too much about it, so I mean it when I say it was an absolute shock when she told me (at 5 o'clock this afternoon, no less) that they would no longer be requiring my services as a nanny.

Talk about out of the blue!

BACKSTORY:
Jennifer, my boss, has finished medical school and one year of her 5 year residency program in radiology. This residency is the reason why they moved to Jacksonville in the first place. She has never so much as hinted that she would quit her job and stay at home; she has even gone as far as to say that she would be bored out of her mind if she didn't have a job out of the home. So needless to say this was completely unexpected.

They were kind enough to offer me 2 weeks severance pay and any assistance they can offer in finding me another job. My last day will be Tuesday, September 13th- a day they picked.

I completely understand why Jennifer wanted to quit her job. Brynn turns 2 tomorrow and Jennifer has completely missed her child growing up. As someone who is about to become a mother, I cannot imagine someone else raising my child, kissing their tears away. I am universally happy for Brynn that she will have her mom there every day now... it was just the worst possible timing, ever.

So now I have no job and no idea how I am going to get one, as I am almost 4 months pregnant and moving to Ocala in 3 months. Honestly, who is going to hire me?! Brad and both our families keep reminding me that everything happens for a reason- that whenever God closes a door He opens a window... but I haven't yet felt that rush of fresh air.

So I need prayers. I don't know how I am going to be able to afford for Brad and I to pay our billd, never mind paying for our baby. We have some money in savings but definitely not enough (yet) to pay all our medical bills! I know that everything is going to work out in the long run, that this did in fact happen for a reason. I just have yet to see that reason.

Football Season Again!

The day Brad has been waiting for since Ron Zook was fired last year finally arrived: game day with our new head coach. I think the only thing that he'll be more excited about it the day our baby is born! It was a great, fun-filled weekend and it went too fast, as usual.

We were lucky enough that my parents were able to come up for the game this year, so we had our whole family together (minus my sister, who had to work) It was great to see Mom and Dad- it makes me really excited to think about the day they relocate and we don't have to wait so long between visits!

It is always fun to sit at the tailgate and see friends and family who we sometimes don't see except for during football season. Julie and I were talking and figured that every Saturday is like a big family reunion!

The game itself was a lot of fun, albeit a little crowded. I am counting myself lucky that I'm not showing (very much) yet because I would have been so uncomfortable squished between Brad and Julie! Julie and I took a walk during the 3rd quarter, trying to find the Gator shop and somehow managed to get lost and ended up in the student section- whoops! But we figured out quickly enough that we needed to go down a level and low and behold we found the Gator shop.

We are looking forward to an exciting football season that we all know is going to go by too fast- but at least this year we have something really great to look forward to not too long after it's over!

Happy Labor Day!